Bookworm

I don’t enjoy reading.
I’m an extremely slow reader.
Reading makes me sleepy.
I’m picky – science fiction and romance novels are definitely O.U.T.

All that being said, I have been doing quite a bit of reading lately, which explains my absence from blog world. A super sweet elderly lady from my congregation lent me three books a couple of weeks ago. And so now I read. (Insert forced smile)

The first book I read was The Shack, by William P. Young. I chose to read this one first because it was the shortest. And I had also heard mention of it on a radio show this past summer, so I figured it would be a good read. And it’s true! It IS a good read! It is actually now one of my very favorites, which I guess doesn’t mean a whole lot since I haven’t read a whole lot of books. :) I just love how it challenged me to think about my relationship with God in a different way. I would highly recommend this book. It is a must read! Just be sure to have some tissues close by!

I am now three-quarters the way through Redeeming Love, by Francine Rivers. It is a romance (ug), but I agreed to read it because it is based (kinda-ish) on Hosea. I’m not really sure I’ve ever read Hosea. And if I have, it has been a really long time because I didn’t realize/remember that the prophet, Hosea, was commanded by God to take a prostitute for his wife. I’m going to have to read Hosea when I finish this book. I’m definitely curious! Although, I’m sure that the Bible will not include (thankfully) are many descriptive scenes. Yikes. This is definitely a book for the mature crowd.

The third book is called A Voice in the Wind, and it is also authored by Francine Rivers. Francine Rivers is one of my friend’s favorite authors and so I have a feeling that I will end up reading her entire FR collection. I wonder if there are sparknotes available (kidding). I’m not sure exactly what this book is about. I have a feeling it is yet another Christian Romance (ug). But, I will have a better idea in a couple of days when I start reading it.

I’m actually starting to enjoy reading.
Novels are easier to read than textbooks.
I read every night before bed.
I still don’t care for romance novels.

A Bit about ME from A to Z

A is for Australia – I have a passion for missions and was afforded the opportunity to go on a campaign to Australia with Kent Hartman in June 2004. It was an incredible experience.

B is for Boat – I have fond memories of sitting in a boat and eating peanut-butter M&M’s while fishing with high-school friends Kaitlin and Alison. I hope someday we can go fishing again. Ice fishing, that is, in Alaska!

C is for Candle – When I sit down to have my personal Bible study time or write in my prayer journal, I always light a candle. It reminds me of God’s presence.

D is for Donuts – I absolutely LOVE donuts. And so does my sidder, Stephanie Dell. This summer we took turns buying donuts for each other. It is a delicious summertime tradition. I am going to have to see what I can do to make sure this tradition is carried on throughout all the seasons…

E is for Elephant – The elephant is one of my two favorite animals. (The other is the moose. What can I say, I like the big ones). I have been told that when I was little I went to the zoo and said, “Elephants talk loud.” It was then logical for them to become my favorite.

F is for Friend – I could use a good friend right now.

G is for God – I can’t wait to hug God.

H is for Hardcore – I realized this summer that I am NOT hardcore. I LOVE camping and hiking, etc…, but two weeks backpacking in the wilderness was too long without showers, beef and chocolate.

I is for Iowa – My dad almost took a job in Iowa when I was in 8th grade. I’m glad we didn’t move.

J is for Japan – I shared my faith for six weeks in Japan the summer after my freshman year of college. It was a tremendous growing experience and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. My sister, Michelle, is now living in Japan and I pray that her faith is growing like mine did. I also hope that I can visit her while she is there!

K is for Kiss – The first time a boy kissed me I thought it was gross. I didn’t understand how people enjoyed such a thing. But the more I kissed, the more I have come to really enjoy the activity. Ha! :)

L is for Laugh – I LOVE to laugh. But, I’m somewhat of a snob when it comes to laughing. I refuse to give courtesy laughs.

M is for Mz. – I wish that the Ms. title would morph into Mz. Mz. looks so much cooler. And let’s face it, ladies who have to select title (like myself) could use some extra coolness.

N is for Noodle – If you ever spend time with my family, don’t be surprised if someone calls you a noodle. In my family, noodle is (really) a term of endearment. My dad is the head noodle.

O is for Obama – I know that it is just a rumor that Obama is Muslim. However, it still really scares me that he has a hint of Muslim background, even if it’s an itty bitty, teeny weeny, tiny bit.

P is for Piano – I really, REALLY want to learn how to play the piano. I know how to read music as a result of all my band years, and I have taught myself some. I just get frustrated when I have to start moving my fingers up and down the ivories. Does anyone know of a good piano teacher in Billings?

Q is for Queen – If I could be queen for a day, I would spend the whole day at a spa. Facials, and massages, and pedicures OH MY!

R is for Reading – I don’t enjoy reading. I would MUCH rather solve algebra problems or make spreadsheets in Excel.

S is for Shack – Currently, I am reading The Shack, by William P. Young.

T is for Thanksgiving – Sometimes my birthday falls on the same day as Thanksgiving. These birthdays are always the best. I mean, you get the best birthday meal AND presents. That’s one unbeatable combination! One particular Thanksgiving birthday, I remember receiving a Precious Moments KJV Bible from my grandparents and a pair of purple overalls from my parents. Oh, and I can’t forget the matching purple clip-on earrings!

U is for understand – I have come to realize that I will never fully understand God, his timing or his ways. Well, while here on earth at least.

V is for Vending Machines – Vending Machines are my weakness. In college I spent all of my laundry quarters on vending snacks. YUM.

W is for Wish – I wish that I was in Alaska right now, teaching. I know, I know. I need to get over it.

X is for Generation X – I’m not exactly sure what Generation X is, but I do know that I like a couple of Miley Cyrus’ songs.

Y is for Yodeling – I want to learn to yodel so that when I travel to the Swiss Alps someday I can show off my yodeling skillz.

Z is for Zipper – My ultimate FAV ride at the fair is the Zipper, hands down. I was first introduced to this delightful ride back in the 90s by my dear friend, Kristine.

I'm Yellow with a SPLASH of Red

On Monday I started my new job. It is not the job I was hoping to have this Fall, but I certainly can’t complain. I have been given an opportunity to work for an INCREDIBLE company and I am overwhelmed with gratefulness.

It’s been a very l o o o n g and tiresome week. I am not used to sitting and listening eight hours a day! The first day was especially taxing with all the company policies and procedures to go over, but thankfully the rest of the week was much more bearable and motivating as we learned about the various programs and systems of the specific job. The trainers also incorporated some fun activities throughout the week as well. We had an ice breaker, played “Thumb Ball,” and took a personality assessment to determine which “color” we are.

I am Yellow. Yellow = Responsibility. Basically what this means is…

I value rules, tradition and authority.
I belong to organizations and contribute to my community.
I handle details well, and I’m a hard worker.
I am useful, productive, a contributor.
I care for others – by upholding the rules.
I anticipate and prepare for the future.
The home and family are the core of society.
It’s important to have structure, laws, and controls.
I appreciate awards and public recognition.
I provide stability within an organization.
I demonstrate my love in practical ways.

And that pretty much sums up my personality – a rule-abiding, structure-loving perfectionist. Well, that is of course before taking in account for that SPLASH of red. Red = Adventure. And I have an undeniably adventurous personality. I don’t agree with everything that characterizes a red, but there are a few characteristics that have a strong presence in my personality. Thus, the aforementioned SPLASH…

I want to explore.
Variety and excitement are fun and stimulating.
Let’s find a new and different way to do it.
Games are for winning, mountains for climbing.
Rules that don’t make sense should be broken. (Well, maybe not broken, but modified so that they do make sense).

Can you see the SPLASH of red? Or maybe it would make more sense to say that I am yellow with red spots. Either way, I think you’ll agree with my analysis. :) And you should definitely check out The Pace Palette to see what color YOU are. It’s very interesting and fun!

Bulls Eye!

I think I may have found my TRUE calling. A professional darter. And I know what you’re thinking, that this profession is FAR from my educational skill set. That’s certainly indisputable, but my natural talent really can't be suppressed any longer!

This past Sunday I was reminding my dad about the dart tournament we had earlier this summer; and how I beat every single male (Dad, Brian, Kyle and Adam) one after another. I was unstoppable. But for some silly reason my dad was convinced that my winning streak was pure luck. RIGHT. And then he went on to say that he could beat me if he just put his mind to it. UH HUH. Now, I will admit that my dad has great determination and usually IS successful whenever he “puts his mind” to something. But I also know that my victory earlier this summer was definitely not luck. So, I challenged him to a game.

We played a game to 301. I beat him. He still had 169 points to go! I cannot even begin to describe how great it felt to SMOKE him! :) We, of course had to play best out of 3 games. He won the second game, but then I ended up winning the last game. SWEET VICTORY!

Dad wanted a rematch tonight. And this time I only needed two games to whip his sorry rear! Love you, Dad! :)

Gesundheit

I have always struggled with knowing whether or not to say “Bless You” when someone sneezes. I realize it’s a strange thing to contemplate, but then again, I’m pretty strange myself so it works. :) So far, I have not found any rule of etiquette to help me with my conundrum. I mean, there are some people out there who will “Bless You” no matter what the circumstance. You sneeze, you will be blessed. During a lecture, in the middle of a prayer, in the bathroom, wherever! There’s no stopping them from blessing you! And then there are people out there who will never ever bless you when you sneeze. You could sneeze sixteen times in a row and it wouldn’t cross their mind to bless you.

What is the purpose of saying “bless you” anyways? I’ve heard that in the olden days people said “bless you” to make certain that the demons stay out of your body. But in other languages, such as Spanish and German, the words used when someone sneezes are words of health. So, maybe it is a gesture of wishing good health upon a sneezing person?

Or, maybe it’s just a an act of kindness. I spent three weeks in the wilderness this past June with a good friend of mine. She has allergies and so naturally she did quite a bit of sneezing each day. Since she is a good friend, and I felt it was an appropriate situation (not during a movie, etc…), I always said “Bless You.” And she always replied, “You too.” At first I just ignored her response, but she kept saying it and so I asked her why she always says “you too.” She told me that she found it to be a good opportunity to return the favor and bless the person that was blessing her. Interesting concept.

This week I am babysitting a little 2ish year old boy. He is so cute! And he is even cuter now because he is becoming much more verbal. Some of the words he uses frequently are: help, please, more, oh no, plane, kitty, milk, and cheese. He also says, “Excuse me” when he toots (too cute!). And he always says, “Bless you” when I sneeze. It is adorable. My heart melts every time and I really feel blessed. Not just because of this little tyke’s words, but because of his unconditional love for me.

I'm still undecided about the whole sneezing thing. But one thing’s for sure, I’m going to try to bless others more often, whether they are sneezing or not.

"Besh ew!"

Ramblings from an Insomniac

I wrote the title for this blog entry just now and thought I was being clever with my made-up word: “insomniac.” When the little squiggly red line didn’t appear, I was shocked and immediately consulted http://www.dictionary.com/ for further investigation of my inventive vocabulary. Turns out I’m not as inventive as I thought. Oh well. The flip side proves that I’m more intelligent than I give myself credit, or perhaps that I’m extremely lucky. It’s a toss-up, really. :)

Anyways, on to the real issue at hand: it's bedtime and I'M WIDE AWAKE AND BUSHY TAILED.

I have been having bouts of insomnia every couple of months for the past year. It started last October when I had several nights in a row where I couldn’t sleep. Then I had another couple of sleepless nights in January. And now I am once again dealing with this terrible condition.

Cure: I have never really had a problem with falling asleep before this last year. Ever. I am that person that can fall asleep anytime, anywhere. I even have that rare Travel Sleeping Disorder (TSD). You know, the one where a person falls asleep after a mere 30 minutes in a car, plane, train, etc… Let me tell ya, I’m not very fun on road trips! So you can imagine how lost I was when I experienced my first episode of insomnia last October. After hours of staying up reading and wasting time on FB, I finally decided to go for a drive. I hoped that my TSD would help get me into my desired state of unconsciousness. So, I got in my car and drove to the next town, 30 miles away, at 3 in the morning. The drive made me sleepy alright, but unfortunately I didn’t factor in the 30 miles I had to drive BACK to my house. I almost didn’t make it back alive. So when the next night of insomnia came along, I got smart and went grocery shopping instead. It turned out to be just as effective and much more practical.

Cause: I think the cause of these spells can be directly associated with various stresses in my life. The first episode occurred during a very stressful time. I was taking a full course load and working part-time. I had long days and not enough hours to complete everything as perfectly as my perfectionist personality would have liked. All the while I was trying to figure out what to do and where to go after my fast-approaching graduation ceremony. Another memorable episode surfaced during a time of great stress due to a dysfunctional relationship. And now, I guess you could say I have great anxiety concerning my overall life and future.

Whine: Cheese? Yes, please!

These past ten months in particular have been very challenging. It seems like every major life decision I have made has failed in one way or another. It’s been very heart-wrenching, discouraging, and has left me feeling hopeless. This is not at all how I pictured my life to be at 25.

I think the most frustrating aspect about my life currently is that I have really, REALLY, tried to take the appropriate time and measures to make the right decisions. I have been prayerful. I have sought after God. I have tried my very best to trust Him completely. And decision after decision, plan after plan has left me broken and in tears. My dreams of being in a loving, godly relationship: crushed. My dreams of having my very own classroom of adorable immpressionable kiddos: crushed. I’m far too stubborn to give up, but I’m just so terrified right now of failing that I really haven’t taken too many steps forward. Rather, I’ve been wallowing in self-pity. I’ve been running. I’ve been ignoring the numerous problems. And I’m embarrassed and ashamed to admit that I’ve been ignoring God.

Resolution: I’m sorry this is such a “Debbie Downer” post. I guess I just needed to confront my struggles and emotions head on. And I’m hoping that doing it publicly will keep me accountable to turning my current, seemingly "rotten" life around. And there are several proactive steps I’m going to work on each day this next week.

1. Stop pulling out my hair.
   
2. Go for a run – one, nice and easy mile.
   
3. Read my Bible.
   
4. Talk to God.
   
5. Make a list of recent BLESSINGS in my life.

I leave encouraged by the inspired words of James and pray for a good night’s rest.
“Come near to God and he will come near to you.” James 4:8